10
Apr
2008
Video: Eli Porter Vs. Envy »
“Dog. I just sent u the best vid in all the ever.” — Mallz
Dear god…I needed this laugh so much today. Eli the BESS. Indeed, everything else in the world will come second in bestness. Why did it look like dude’s brain was melting as the battle went on.
Why was Marv-o feeling up on kid’s mitties? God Bless Eli the Bess Porter. BESS!
Classic bars…
“I’m the bess, I diiiiiid it.” — Eli
/ Videos /
Mallz
On Apr 10, 2008 | Respond
this is the only video in the history of niggotry that is hilarious from start to finish.
THEY HAD THAT NIGGA IN A HEART!!!!!!!
Tec
On Apr 14, 2008 | Respond
This is absolutely THE funniest Internet sh*t EVER!!! Eli needs his own reality TV show, LoL!!!
modi
On Apr 21, 2008 | Respond
ok. you’ve taken it in. let me break down why this is indeed the best youtube clip of all time. there is more comedy packed in this 4 and a half minutes than anything i’ve ever seen. let’s go through it all.
0:10: “it’s ya boy marv-o.” his swagger is incredible. he ever so slightly rocks from side to side.
0:26: the introduction of the peanut gallery. my favorite is “steven jackson, action jackson.” but do you all see marv-o’s arms up on his homie in the middle!? he’s just maxing and relaxing. but it is still ridiculous. so
0:33: “y’all already know the rules, so we ain’t gon’ waste no time on that.” that’s what marv-o just said, right? then he proceeds to tell us the rules. he can’t make up his mind!
0:59: eli is hyped. but he’s not even about to rap. but he still pumps both of his arms like he’s about to bless the beat. good grief.
do i even need to say how classic envy’s flow is?
1:10 and 1:14: this is where it gets intense. envy calls eli a cripple. TWICE! and eli’s cool with it!
1:37: envy’s haircut is similar to boosie. but just like 30 times worse. find him a barber, immediately.
2:03: marv-o’s boo (yea, the dude he felt up 26 seconds deep in the video) gives a ridiculous pose. like, a “check me out, check my swag, i’m the man” type joint. but it’s so weak, and the camera doesn’t cut away. so he just looks extra lame.
2:10: envy is confused as to how eli curses twice and is still able to rap. marv-o tells us that any cursing will get you disqualified instantly.
2:17: eli has realized his dilemma and promptly stops flowing. i don’t think i’ve seen anyone this nervous. the music even stops at 2:26, and eli has to think of something, quick. oh boy.
2:48: eli gets right back at it, with a series of “yeaa” noises like a gucci mane or a jeezy impression. i won’t even tell you how good each of his lines are, just listen to it.
3:36: eli curses again, and is so hyped. they end the competition right there, and put a heart-shape over eli. why? i don’t even know. good grief.
anything else you spot, let me know.
P double O
On Apr 24, 2008 | Respond
Hey People !
yes Yes this video is very ridiculous & funny.
I have been reading allot of forums on this video and allot of people seem to believe that Eli is retarded which he is not. However!, Eli Porter is one of the many thousands of African American that has a disorder called (MS) Multiple Sclerosis, which some people are born with it and some can genetically develop (MS) later on in life. Furthermore,. I think the video is very funny and I don’t see anything stupid about a brother with a disorder that has the confidence and skillz to try to master rhymes.
However…I would just like to put out there, (that brother Marv-O just can’t keep his hands off that guy in the middle. That is why Eli was rapping about a gay parade because Envy, Marv-o & that other guy all hang out together.
Zillz™
On Apr 24, 2008 | Respond
hahaha. I’m mad modi & P double O broke it down like Monk breaks down a case.
modi
On Apr 29, 2008 | Respond
that’s what we do.
ada
On May 6, 2008 | Respond
I agree with P. Someone who’s retarded would most likely not be able to come up with rhymes, let alone rhymes like he exhibited, with figurative language, etc. It’s the way he internalizes things that are weird, with his eyes rolling up in the back of his head.
khal
On May 6, 2008 | Respond
in all seriousness, eli is the truth. i mean, envy had those wack ass rhymes and look what happened? a dude he called cripple ate him in a battle. seriously; get past the fact that, yeah, he paused (which i think had more to do with him cussing than anything - i think thats why he said ‘i said freakin’ at the end of his rhyme before the vote), and he was being told to stop cussing or something.
in any case, eli’s rhymes, while not grammy-award winning, were off the wall and made me laugh. shit has me rollin, still does.
i keep it forreal.
Mike
On May 7, 2008 | Respond
Eli has dope rhymes and a wicked flow. I love to see him rock some dirty RZA beats
DaILLeZT
On May 12, 2008 | Respond
ol boi Eli looked possesed! he put it down though